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In like a lion, out like a lamb! This is a good way to describe the RAF (7-7) performance in the Semifinal Week 16 match against the now DFFL 22 Humble Bowl Champion, and perennial regular season juggernaut, DNF (9-5). A huge kudos to DNF, who not only won the Humble Bowl, but did so in crushing style. This was the biggest blowout so far in the DFFL 22 Playoffs - a whopping 75 points!
RAF came into this game as an underdog. However, following a smashing 2022 scoring best 209 points in the Rant Bowl, the Fitz had hope! Losing by just under 75 points to DNF was especially painful as it was largely due to lack-luster, frustratingly, soulless, fire-them-all performances by RAF homers on Christmas Day! More on that later.
DNF had a rough start in 2022, but finished Lamborghini-style as the #2 seed among solid competition both within his own Malt Division and the Barley Division. DNF went from, "Will he make the playoffs?" to Angry-run-like "get the F out of my way!" so he could play the likes of RAF in the second round. Very solid! Very Strategic!
Okay, let's start with the Humble Bowl loser. As eluded to earlier, RAF sought a respectable finish to his uphill battle versus DNF on Sunday afternoon. The result was homer Denver Defense having their worst game (-4) of the season. Latavius "bounce away" Murray getting less than single digits, and Courtland "Waaaahhh! GetMeTheBall!" Sutton having a forgettable, under 12 point performance. During this horrid, stomach-acid inducing game, RAF saw his loss get larger and more sickening, as his team grew ever more dysfunctional - a double whammy that produced one of RAF's worst nights of the 2022 season. At QB, Mahomes did aight! With 3 TDs and over 220 yds, Mahomes is definitely a bright spot for RAF's roster heading into 2023. Rhamondre Stevenson at RB, had one of his worst games, sealing his performance by coughing up the ball near the goal line in what would have been a potential game-winning TD. RAF's receiver sets actually did better than they did in his 209-point Rant Bowl performance; however, were no where near the production he needed to make a roar in this game. At the Flex, the Fitz fell way below the 90+ points he got in the Rant Bowl, only scoring a combined 42 points from the likes of McKinnon, Lat. Murray, and Joe Mixon. That's about it. Rest in Peace, 2022!
DNF had one of his best games of the season in the Humble Bowl. The Fantasy brought TNF lack-luster points from Christian Kirk (5), and okay, but not great points from Trevor Lawrence (28) into the Holiday Weekend. DNF was not phased that initial projections placed the Fantasy at risk of losing subsequent matchups. Instead, he opened up a barrage of artillery in crap talk against RAF, Friday morning, the likes of which took RAF by surprise! RAF quickly had to stop his treadmill and find memes and witty retorts in attempt to comfort his fragile self-esteem. But ultimately on Saturday, DNF would show in action what his words reflected only a few hours earlier.
The crushing began early on Christmas Eve. Justin Jefferson 30+ points! TJ Hockenson 33+ points! His best performance as a Viking, and second best of the season! Then, Derrick Henry, 22 points, which was actually disappointing for what Hank can do against the Texans. After the dust settled on those games, RAF had a 3% chance to win #smh . In the later 24 December games, Sanders sucked arse with 7 points, and Diontae Johnson was forgettable bringing DNF less than 13 points. However, DNF didn't really need much more from anyone left on his roster.
The dagger that truly crushed RAF's soul came on Christmas Day, a day that will live in infamy for all of BroncoLand Football. Cam "Almost Got Fired" Akers crushed the Broncos with his 40.7 POINT PERFORMANCE!! This dismantling, over-kill of RAF's not even cold corpse should have been grounds to charge DNF in a court of law for 'abusing a corpse'!! Finally, DNF got forgettable performances from 'Kick his ass Sea..' Bass and his homer Titan Defense.
Of note, DNF may need to figure out his C. Kirk dilemma headed into DFFL Bowl V. Perhaps Drake London will enter the equation given his solid performance with Ridder as QB in Atlanta?
Congratulations to Humble Bowl Champ, DNF!! Your first Playoff Win!! RAF is confident his off-season picks and contracts will once again put him in post season bowl games, next year #wink .
FINAL SCORE:
RAF - 118.06
DNF - 192.86
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